Practical Merfolology

Brooker’s Law.

Even a small practice is worth a great theory.

Laws of Klipshtein (in the appendix to mechanical engineering).

1. Your patent application will certainly be late for a week against a similar application filed by another.

2. The stability of delivery is always inversely proportional to the intensity of the calendar schedule.

3. Any wire cut into pieces will be too short.

The laws of Klipshtein (in the appendix to the development of prototypes and production).

1. The allowable deviations will accumulate unidirectionally to cause a maximum of difficulties in the assembly.

2. If the scheme requires M parts, then in the warehouse they will be M-1.

3. The motor will not spin in the wrong direction.

4. The reliability system will disable other systems.

5. The device protected by a high-speed fuse will be able to protect this fuse by firing first.

6. The error will only appear after the final check of the device is completed.

7. After the last of the 16 bolts is removed from the protective cover, it turns out that the wrong cover was removed.

8. After the casing is secured with 16 retaining bolts, it turns out that you forgot to put the gasket inside.

9. After assembling the installation, extra details will appear on the workbench.

Universal laws for young engineers, developed by the Committee of Practical Recommendations of the International Association of Engineers-Philosophers.

1. Any mistake that can sneak into any calculation will creep into it.

2. Any error in any calculation will be aimed at causing the greatest harm.

3. In any formula, constants (especially those taken from technical reference books) should be treated as variables.

4. The most accurate size on any diagram or drawing has the greatest chance of being missed.

5. If the test setup works flawlessly, all subsequent ones will be faulty.

6. The request for changes that absolutely need to be made to the device always comes after its manufacture is almost finished.

7. Parts that simply can not be collected incorrectly, yet will be collected incorrectly.

8. All terms of supply obligations should be multiplied by a factor of 2.0.

9. Technical parameters of the devices declared by the manufacturer should be multiplied by a factor of 0.5.

10. The expectations of buyers of the new car should be multiplied by a factor of 0.25.

11. Any device requiring adjustment and adjustment usually does not respond to either one.

12. If more than one person is responsible for an error in the calculation, you can not find the guilty.

13. The same devices, tested in the same way, will behave in a completely different way in operation.

Law of the magazine “Harpers Magazine”.

The thing can not be found until you buy another in return for it.

The law of the aircraft.

When your plane is late, the plane you would like to change to, flies on time.

The law of riding a bike.

Regardless of where you are going – the road always goes uphill, and the wind is oncoming!

The law of cat despair.

As soon as the cat stretched out and began to fall asleep on your lap, you urgently needed to get up and go, say, to the bathroom.

The Law of the Bridge.

The partner is always to blame. Law of Johnson and Laird.

Toothache usually begins on a Saturday night.

Buka’s law.

You always find the lost in your last pocket.

Law of Walker.

Any implementation requires further development.

Conservation laws.

1. Everything that is bad lies quickly disappears.

2. Money disappears faster than we think.

The Cocteau rule.

From time to time you need to rest from doing nothing.

Axiom of Lec.

Life forces a person to many voluntary actions.

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