Murphy’s Laws on Parental Responsibilities

The first law of parental responsibilities.

No one really wants to occupy your position, but anyone thinks that he could better cope with these duties.

The second law of parental responsibilities.

Those who think that they could have coped with these duties better, suffer a particularly strong failure when given a chance.

The laws of mother Murphy.

1. Everything that your parents did was wrong.

2. Now that you yourself have become a parent, everything that you do is not going well.

3. Your children will put themselves into the credit of absolutely everything that will turn out as it should.


The more you try not to repeat the mistakes of your parents, the more likely it is that it will happen.

The best advice of mother Murphy.

1. Hope for the best.

2. Prepare for the worst.

3. Love them, no matter what happens.


The higher your expectations, the stronger you will be disappointed.

Opening of Mother Murphy.

Mom knows better … but nobody listens to them.

A cunning trap.

It is much easier to shoulder the responsibilities of parents than to get rid of them.

Not in the forehead, so on the forehead!

If your (a) spouse has not yet brought you to a disability or even to a white heat, your children will.

Theresa Bloomingdale’s discovery.

Murphy could not help being a mother.

Brief description of the nature of work performed by parents.

1. Parental responsibilities – this is a round-the-clock work without pay, without an increase in salary, without promotions in office and with a minimum of holidays.

2. Parents are responsible for everything that happens to their children.

3. The main professional diseases of parents – a sense of guilt and a sense of responsibility for all the sins of their children.

4. Parents do not receive compensation for harm or other additional benefits for special working conditions.

5. Parents never have the right to quit – even when the children strongly ask them about it.

6. Parents do not receive any signs of attention or respect until they die – and then it’s too late.

The doctrine of awesome responsibility.

The more you think about the awesome fact that it is you who are fully responsible for human life, the more you lose sight of another fact, namely: whatever you say or do, your child will in any case pay little attention to it or at all zero attention and will carelessly get up what he or she likes.

The law of good and bad.

1. Bad features of the child are always inherited by the family of your spouse.

2. Good traits are inherited naturally from your family.

Lesson for parents.

1. By the time you finally learn something about raising children, you are already a grandfather or grandmother.

2. The only thing that you will learn for real, you will understand how little you know about this.

Limits of your long-suffering.

1. You will not know what the limits of your long-suffering are until you have children.

2. From infancy and beyond, your children will discover these limits and push you beyond them.

Law of the parental board.

Whatever advice you give your children, they will ignore 80 percent and pervert the rest.

Rehabilitation of grandparents.

You will never be able to appreciate in a proper way how difficult it was for your parents and what they had to sacrifice until they had their own children. That’s why your parents are so happy when you have your children.

The law of grandmother’s omniscience.

Your mommy knows best. And absolutely everything. And she will never let you forget about it.


You did not listen to her when you were young … and you still do not.

Consolation advice.

1. Your parents will be much less angry with your children than they once were angry with you.

2.You would also be angry with your children less if you saw them only once or twice a month and could send them home as soon as they start behaving badly.

Dilution competitions.

The harder you are with your children, the more stubborn your parents will climb out of your skin to dilute them.

Stupid classification.

Why do mothers who work are called “working mothers”? After all, do not call the same fathers who work, “working fathers”!

An alternative to supermatter.

You do not need to be a superman to succeed at the same time in your career and in the upbringing of your child. The only thing you need for this is a post with an annual salary of $ 75,000 and assistance from your cohabitant.

Duty to increase the salary.

The next day after you receive an increase at work, your private kindergarten will politely tell you that the payment for the child is increasing.


This increase in payment will exceed your salary increase.

Supermatter Syndrome.

An excellent mother can always be calculated by the way she behaves during a business breakfast. If a woman climbs into her pocket for a credit card, and pulls a pacifier instead – that’s it.

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