Murphy’s laws on education

Unsurpassed method.

This is how you should act if the child behaves in an undesirable manner:

1. First try to reason with him.

2. Then try not to pay attention to his trick.

3. Then try to threaten him.

4. After that, try the punishment.

5. Finally, when all these methods do not achieve the goal, tell your child that his deed made an indelible impression on you, and in return for this, buy him a gift.


On the very day when you forget to grumble at your child for behaving in an undesirable manner, his bad behavior will disappear.

How to be consistent?

The simplest way to remain consistent in the upbringing of children is to constantly and systematically lose your temper.

An old trick with a rope.

The more piece of rope you give them, the more rope they will ask for.

The law of passive resistance.

1. What is more beneficial to them, the more they rest.

2. The fairer your decision, the more they whine and complain.

3. The later something reaches them, the more obstinate they remain with their opinions.

4. The more you need their help, the more often they bite.

Law of the reverse action.

1. The harder you are, the more unbearable they are.

2. The more you need silence, the more awful they make noise.

3. Than you are neater, so they are looser.

Judgment from the converse.

The worse you have, the worse mood they have.

Rule of respect.

1. If you are not able to convince them, say that this is the current rule.

2. The only rule really works: “Because I said so.”

The law of parent teams.

The only parent team that your child will not react to disobeying is a command that the child has not heard.

Moments about parent errors.

You do not learn much from the mistakes you made with your first child, because every child is completely different. And with each of you you’ll make a completely new bunch of mistakes.

The doctrine “the monkey sees – the monkey repeats”.

Children carefully mold themselves in the image and likeness of their parents. They copy every mistake they make, weakness and failure.


If you want to get documented proof of your worst mistakes as a parent, listen to your own children playing dolls.

Dangerous threat.

Never say to your offspring: “Wait, your own children will appear” … it may happen that you do not have to wait especially long.

Futility slaps.

When your underprivileged (suddenly) becomes bigger than you, you will have to come up with some sort of alternative to slapping.

The aphorism about good manners.

1. Your child will start to lower the water in the toilet and close the door in the fridge from the day he flies out of his native nest. (A roommate in a dormitory will surely be killed if he does not.)

2. Your child will begin to apologize for eructation, exactly the day when he first tries to teach his own child the good manners.

The paradox of good manners.

1. Those with whom they twist love and go on dates do not pay attention to their disgusting manners.

2. The manners of those with whom they go on dates and twist love, are just as disgusting.

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