If he is jealous, then he loves – that’s what most people think. And on the contrary, if he likes, he will be jealous. What does it mean? And this means that in the modern world, love often chooses jealousy with its companion. But if you understand, then the feeling of jealousy does not bring any positive emotions, moreover, it is painful for the object as well as for the subject of jealousy.
Jealousy can kill love and destroy a family. In addition, persistent feelings and doubts can cause serious illnesses. No wonder they say “All diseases from nerves”, and indeed, our nervous system completely controls the human body, and the psyche is directly related to the nervous system.
Thus, the emotions that cause changes at the mental level, often lead to the fact that the functioning of internal organs is also violated. “Sick of love,” “sick from anguish” – these well-known expressions are direct proof of the above.
Almost daily, we use expressions such as “take to heart,” “I can not digest it,” “the head is all around,” “it’s across the throat,” “it hurts to see,” etc., indicating that , that our emotions and physical sensations are closely related to each other.
What is jealousy? Jealousy is not one feeling, but a complex of feelings. Jealousy is associated with uncertainty, doubts, resentment, anger, anger and, of course, self-pity to the beloved. This complex of feelings has a more powerful destructive effect, as if only one of these feelings was acting.
The first blow of jealousy is directed to the head. Such a headache is often not helped even by anesthetics. The next stage is a nervous breakdown. Relationships inevitably begin to deteriorate, as jealousy is the cause of aggression.
The main feature of jealousy is that a person begins to see in another person their property, and jealousy can be directed not only towards the spouse (the bride or groom), but also to friends, parents and children.
If we are jealous, we begin to notice how much attention is to us, and how many are around, and, of course, feel deprived and less loved. To combat jealousy, it is necessary, first of all, to understand the causes of its evocative. Denote them:
Linkage for relationships – you are considering a person as a property. You deprive him of the right to have any desires and refuse him free will. You build it on a pedestal. You regard it as the meaning of your life. One way or another, but the fear of being abandoned needs to be overcome, otherwise you risk personally killing your relationship with your loved ones. Hatred of imaginary opponents is not able to make relations stronger. Remember, every person is an individual, do not deprive him of his freedom.
Like attracts like that – if you do not immediately reject the possibility of betraying your loved one, then (without knowing it) you admit the thought that in your life there can be another man. Before you jealous of a loved one, think, and do not flirt with the one who gives you signs of attention.
You are not sure of yourself. “Why did he choose me?” – if you ask yourself this question, then you have a fear that you will find a better replacement. Insecurity in yourself (or in your attractiveness) is the reason for your jealousy. Love yourself, learn to appreciate yourself. If you do this, then the people around you will also appreciate you. Remember that each person is unique, and be yourself. Get only positive emotions from communicating with people who are dear to you.
Distrust. Your relationship with a loved one can develop in two ways. First, you do not trust him.Nevertheless, you try to keep the relationship, while not letting the person you love away from yourself more than a meter, and control every step of it. Naturally, you live in constant experience and anxiety. The second way – you trust your beloved. As a result, you live in peace and enjoy the communication with him.
For the basis of your relationship, you choose the phrase “Jealous, therefore, loves.” However, the feeling of love can be expressed in much more appropriate ways. For example, it can be done using words or SMS messages. Your intonation and movements are also evidences of your love. Jealousy is connected with distrust and constant suspicions, it is not a means of expressing love, since it brings only negative emotions.
If, however, you are still overcome by a feeling of jealousy, but you want to eliminate this feeling, the following tips will help you to correct yourself.
Treat your partner with a sense of trust. Imagine that your disbelief, you undeservedly offend him. You can not change anything for the better, be tormented by suspicions and doubts, you can only destroy all the best. Your favorite person can, for example, have the following thoughts: does not trust, then does not love anymore; why be true if she does not trust me. Think about it and stop pounding your relationship.
Stop controlling your loved one. Excessive attention (for example, the twenty-fourth call to work) will only irritate your loved one. Do not put a man in a dependent position and determine each step.
Believe in yourself, in your attractiveness. Love yourself, and others will love you. The attention of men, as a rule, is aimed at those women, whose head is proudly raised and shoulders are straightened.
Find a case for yourself. Hobby, work will help you to drive away unreasonable thoughts about the treason of a person dear to you. Think: you will get rid of jealousy, and deserve respect from your loved one, and, in the end, do something useful.
So, if you want a calm and happy life without the stress of grievances and feelings, then you need to forget about jealousy as quickly as possible. Expensive every day spent next to a person close to you, do not waste time on finding out the relationship caused by jealousy. Love and be loved!