A person is by nature structured in such a way that he can not live without communication. Through communication, people transmit not only information, but also emotions, they get acquainted or develop new ideas. Thus, communication plays an exceptional role in our lives.
But communication can deliver not only positive, but also negative emotions. Particularly offensive to a person when he took the information as truth, and later learned that it was a lie.
Indeed, we often do not notice when they lie to us. Is it possible to learn to recognize a lie? There are no medicines for lying, it’s unlikely to insure yourself against untruth forever. This is how a person works, which sometimes starts to lie even to himself, so skillfully that he believes it.
However, any lie is nevertheless endowed with indirect signs, which can lead to its clean water. It is only necessary to pay attention to them during the conversation. In any case, hasty conclusions are not recommended. In the end, you are not Sherlock Holmes (and even he was sometimes mistaken).
The principle is that usually someone who gives a lie for a real person feels uncomfortable. Even if the lie is harmless, then still a person experiences a feeling of fear for what can be unmasked. In captivity, he begins to get nervous. And even more so if the question is serious.
To lie, you need an excellent excerpt and iron nerves. But even in this case, some signs of a lie people nevertheless reveal, they will indicate how strong his inner nervousness is. What are these signs? The first group of characteristics has a bearing on the speech of your interlocutor.
Use of useless facts in speech. You ask about one thing, but the answer contains something completely different. Talking about the interior, instead of telling about the guests, a person tries to avoid talking about what he wants to hide. The Liar will bring you a huge number of seemingly most believable stories. Purpose: make the story credible.
The Liar leaves a direct answer. The question you asked will be answered by another question. For example, you ask: “Did you see my notebook?”. Instead of an unambiguous “no”, you can hear the following: “Where could I see it?”. This situation is nothing more than avoiding a direct answer, by giving you an indirect answer, that is, the interlocutor acts on the principle of “guess yourself”.
The following situation is subject to the same principle. You ask the interlocutor: “Do you really think that you will cope with the task?”. You get again an ambiguous answer: “Friends treat me like a genius!”. In this way a person hides his insecurity in himself. Remember that liars tend to avoid “yes” and “no” answers. Ask a question that requires either a “yes” or “no” answer. Repeat this question until you get an unambiguous answer to it.
You have received an answer according to the question asked. The answer of your interlocutor practically copies your question? There is an occasion to reflect, but not because of it, that does not have time to come up with its believable version. Or you have to wait a long time for an answer, which can also be regarded as an active work of the interlocutor’s brain in search of something that would answer you better.
Funny answers. You asked a question, but in response heard an anecdote? Keep your eyes open. And what do you do in this case? Laugh at the wit of the interlocutor and stop bothering him? Think about whether it is not conscious whether your interlocutor jokes with an answer.
The nervousness of a person (which can be caused by a lie) can be indicated by external signs such as a slower (or, conversely, faster) speech, frequent coughing, stammering, heavy breathing, the appearance of droplets of sweat on the forehead , changing the tone and voice of the speaker, etc. All this can testify to the inner work done by a person above himself in order to conceal the truth.
What distinguishes a sincere story? By telling you a true story, the interlocutor, as a rule, repeatedly returns back, that is, specifies some facts or complements the information. After all, when we tell something, we can forget about some nuances, as a result we return to them later.
A liar is unlikely to do this, because all his attention is focused on the plausible presentation of a fictitious story to you, you can not get off here, otherwise inaccuracies can be found in speech. A second group of signs is associated with the body, indicating that a person may lie.
Please note whether your interlocutor is trying to unconsciously close from you. This can indicate his movements with his hands: a liar can cover his mouth or constantly scratch his nose. As an attempt to put a barrier between yourself and you can be regarded and the movement of the head of the interlocutor. Pay attention to whether your interlocutor lowers your head down or whether it pushes it back.
The fact of the change from foot to foot indicates the desire to leave as quickly as possible. A small step back (especially after you asked a question) also indicates that the person is internally tense.
The complete lack of gestures also does not support the narrator. This can mean that he is completely focused on how to be as plausible as possible to convey to you fictional information. Active brain work in this case requires a lot of energy. Energy for such a thought process is also borrowed from other parts of the body.
Be sure to pay attention to the emotions of your interlocutor.
First, excessive emotions (played) do not favor sincerity. By stormy joy, or from an unnecessarily overstated courtesy, a person can try to hide his true feelings.
Second, a bad reaction can also be an attempt to hide real feelings. During the conversation, you joked, and the interlocutor smiled already when you started talking about something else – this situation is not uncommon in case of deceit, because the liar is completely concentrated on his fictitious history and can not immediately perceive what you are saying. In this kind of situation, it is difficult for your interlocutor to support the thread of conversation.
You can conduct an experiment. Sharply change the subject. Observe the interlocutor’s reaction. If he happily joins in her discussion (although five minutes ago he did not directly answer your questions), then, most likely, before that he was telling a lie.
The liar perceives a similar situation as a relief, because she gives him a chance to escape from the previous conversation he did not like. But if your interlocutor did not even think to lie to you, he would rather be surprised than pleased, change the topic and try to return to the previous conversation.
Analyze how much time your interlocutor needs to answer a question taken by surprise. The faster he responds to him, the less you can doubt the veracity of a person.
If you have doubts about the sincerity of the words of the interlocutor, then indirectly let him know about your feelings. How to do it? Hold the pause after the interlocutor’s replica. If he is lying, you will immediately see on his face uncertainty or embarrassment, but if he tells the truth, then his natural reaction will be irritation or a closer look at you.
On the inner nervousness of a person (the cause of which may well be a lie) indicate the movements of the eyes. It is not without reason that people’s eyes were nicknamed “the mirror of the soul”. A person perceives information if his eyes are straight. But, for example, if the eyes “run”, then, perhaps, your interlocutor is trying to hide something from you, while he unconsciously avoids establishing eye contact.
And one more tip: learn during the conversation to notice if the speaker has any of the above signs, indicating that he is not truthful.However, you do not need to immediately expose a person, because, perhaps, you are mistaken, and you can offend him. What you will take as an attempt to lie to you, perhaps, will simply be the result of the fatigue of your interlocutor.
The combination of certain signs, seen by you in the process of conversation, does not make your interlocutor a liar. A person is always very difficult. Remember this before drawing conclusions. And never do it hastily.
Interesting fact, due to the fact that women live by feelings, they feel the lies more sharply and are more skilfully deceiving. As for men, then their first position, as a rule, is logic. It is much easier to expose a man’s lie than a woman’s, and to deceive the stronger half is harder. A woman more subtly feels the words spoken to her, she primarily pays attention to human behavior.