American psychologist Eric Berne introduced to science such a concept as the “scenario of the life path” (he is also the “scenario of fate”). This scientist became the founder of the theory of transaction analysis. A significant number of people at the subconscious level have created for themselves a certain scenario (the plan of life).
According to this scenario, most people structure different lengths of time: this can be both months and years. Throughout life, a person engages in nothing more than the realization of his life plan. As a rule, the basis for scenarios lies in childhood, in children’s dreams and illusions that can accompany a person throughout his life.
What is a script? Synonyms for the “script” can be words such as “program”, “plan”. As for theatrical productions, plays, programs and plans for life are “written” in advance. Moreover, like the other scenario, the script has its author for life. The folding of the fate of a person is influenced by different people and factors, but parents determine the important, important impact on the fate of their child.
We give an example. Mom, stretching her son alone, so he protects him, that the boy develops the idea that he is not capable of anything. In addition, my mother often repeats: “What a weak girl you are! I do not even know if you can start and support a family! “. As a result, a man grows out of the boy, afraid to take responsibility for the family, difficult to make decisions, unable to take responsible action, etc.
Tales loved by a person in the early stages of his life also have a huge impact on his future destiny. You will be surprised, but you will find a lot of similarities in your behavior and the behavior of that fairy-tale hero with whom you did not part in childhood. For example, “Little Mermaid” and “Thumbelina” are susceptible to sacrificial love, “koloboks” can not stay for a long time on any business; without encountering serious obstacles, they are rolling around in life, etc.
It’s fair to say that a person is the creator of his destiny. His ability to think and rationally perceive the world around him determines his fate. Each person plans their own way of life independently. Freedom and power are two components that are necessary for any person.
Freedom is directly related to the plans that a person intends to implement. Power allows a person to comprehend the freedom that is in his hands. This is also characteristic for the case when the genetic code along with close and native people determined the life path of a particular person. The life of such a person is constantly in a state of struggle.
Thus, fate is determined by two main factors:
1. the influence of parents on the formation of the psyche of their child;
2. subconscious programming of a person’s plot, according to which the whole life path or a certain period of time must pass.
So, how do you change your destiny? Any act, embodied in life, is born either by the independent will of man, or is an integral part of the “scenario.” The psychologist will argue that your behavior is “scenario”, if you, for example, complain to him that your destiny is determined by evil fate, that you during the day and night feel the oppressive effects of circumstances, etc. Walking in a circle – that’s what is a characteristic feature for scenario behavior.
If similar life episodes are constantly repeated, then the best option is getting a consultation from the therapist. For example, for an American, there is nothing shameful about if he went to see a therapist. This situation is not typical for Russia, which can be due to our worldview, culture and upbringing.
We do not want to “take out rubbish out of the hut”, even if the hut is our consciousness, and rub is our thoughts. In this case, self-analysis will help. It’s not easy to carry it out yourself. And yet, any person is able to help himself with his own efforts.
First, we should realize the attitudes that we acquired at a very early age, an adult is quite capable of realizing such an attempt. A person should evaluate the extent to which the repetitions that were often repeated in childhood by parents and close people affected his future destiny.
Not a bad effect will be in the event that there is someone to talk on this topic, so to speak “pour out the soul.” It can be a close friend or girlfriend and, of course, a sister or brother. Let us give an example. If a boy is constantly repeating something like “men can not complain and cry,” then the boy-the future man-can grow up closed and incapable of expressing his feelings. These are not very good qualities can accompany him throughout his life.
It is possible that you are at the mercy of the first childhood memories. For example, if it is “poking” in a kindergarten for an age that is slightly less than the average for a group, then an adult can grow up from a child who, slightly, but feels “huja” in comparison with others, some kind of insignificant, but inferiority.
When you have found out what is your barrier, then you are quite capable of freeing yourself from interfering with you to change the fate of the program. This applies to the most important events in your life, such as career growth, family creation, the birth of children, etc. You should take the following steps.
Identify the cause of the recurrence of life events. Answer the following questions, then analyze them:
1. What is the general reason for the frequency of episodes?
2. Who are the actors in each particular episode, and is there a similarity between them, if we consider all the episodes in aggregate?
3. What do you do with each repetition episode?
All you need is to find a pattern, build all the events in one logical series. The causes of all sorts of troubles are often hidden in ourselves. Only by determining these reasons, you will be able to change your destiny. The reason for the setbacks may be the installation received in childhood (for example, you were constantly told that only dishonest people are around and now you are only dealing with those), and the story created exclusively by you (after some defeat you programmed yourself as a loser in all matters).
Throw aside excuses. Forget about such combinations of words as “I could translate this into reality provided …” or “If only …”. Look at the events that have already occurred from a different angle. For example, it’s been several years since you did not go to a higher education institution. ” However, from time to time you convince yourself that you could become a well-known excellent student in the event that there were no introductory tests. Most likely, there were a lot of similar moments on your life’s path. What do you need? You do not need to read “If only …”, but to evaluate the reasons why you did not even try to pass the exams. The reasons can be different. This is laziness, and family attitudes (immediately work, and not “sit out pants” at the university), and doubt in success (lack of self-confidence), and inadequate training, etc. Think about what could be done in This moment. Systematize this approach to self-analysis to avoid such mistakes in the future.
Stop looking for the guilty. Neither the circumstances, nor the people around you, nor you yourself should be the source of the blame for what happened. Both feelings of resentment and guilt have never been and will not be a good adviser either to you or to anyone else. Do not you have a destiny? This article is designed to help you, but do not set you up against your parents. They are not to blame in the course of your life.The man himself is the creator of his own destiny and often writes for himself his or her own story, positive or negative (almost always without knowing it).
Do not expect that the result will not be long in coming. Do not disappoint yourself with the fact that you did not get an instant result. It takes a long period of time for the human psyche to be reconstructed into a “new wave”. Psychic is an extremely complex instrument. It is necessary to be able to look into the eyes of fate. Its fate should not be cursed, and make friends with it. Do not be afraid to look back. Be able to see in your past a good, not just a negative mix of circumstances.
Think about it, and do not you yourself want to suffer unhappiness. No, not consciously. It’s about your subconscious striving. Often it happens that a person in general likes to feel unhappy, he begins to feel sorry for himself, receiving satisfaction from pity. He seeks pity and support from other people. He lives it. You “compose” yourself a happy person. Do not make a chain of negative events to justify your dramatic plot. Line up the story of a happy person.