Kitchen Merfolology



The law of O’Reilly’s kitchen.

Cleanliness is something out of the impossible.

Seven laws of the kitchen mess.

1. No device of the universal food processor will work properly.


Consequence.

The more expensive the combine, the less it is used.

2. The simpler the instruction (for example, “Click here”), the harder it is to find where to press it all the same.

3. In the family recipe just found in the old cookbook, the unit of measurement of the main component will be recorded illegibly.

4. If the dish is spoiled, anything that you add to its salvation will only worsen the matter.

5. Delight always comes from the dish that required the least effort in cooking. Example: if you cook a duck with apples, then you will receive compliments for baked potatoes.

6. If you had to specifically go to a store for a product, then it is on him that your guest will find an allergy.

7. The more time and labor you invested in preparing the dinner, the more likely that the guests will always discuss the other dinners that preceded it.

The law of evening reception.

The more food you have prepared, the less your guests will eat.

The laws of the kitchen of Alice Hammond.

1. The souffle rises and the cream is beaten only when preparing a family dinner or lunch for guests that you really did not want to invite.

2. If there is only one spoiled among the eggs, then it is you who will break it into dough for the cake.

3. It is worth putting some kitchen utensils in the dishwasher, as it is immediately needed; If you used a measuring cup for a liquid, then it will immediately be needed to measure something dry.

4. The time for eating food is inversely proportional to the time it takes to cook it.

5. Whatever dish you cook, it turns out that your guest ate it at breakfast.

The laws of the housewife.

1. If in doubt, if the meat is pulled out of the freezer to defrost it, then you forgot to do it.

2. If you do not remember if the coffee maker was turned off, then you did not turn it off.

3. If you decide to go on the way for bread and eggs, thinking that they are not at home, they will be at home.

4. If you doubt whether you have enough money for lunch with your family in a restaurant, then they will not be enough.


The rule of washing glassware Hamilton.

The spot you are trying to scrape is always on the other side.

Consequence.

If the stain is inside, then it is impossible to get to it.

Yeager’s Law.

Washing machines break only during the washing process.

Consequence.

All breakdowns occur on the day when the technician is off.

Walker Housekeeping Law.

Dirty linen is always more than clean.

The refutation of Walker’s law, put forward by Cleve.

If it’s clean, it’s not linen.

The banana principle.

If you bought unripe bananas, then by the time of maturation, they will no longer remain.

If you bought them ripe, bananas will spoil before they have time to eat.

The Thyssen Gastronomy Act.

The hardness of the oil is inversely proportional to the softness of the bun.

Woodside Grocery Principle.

It always breaks the basket in which the eggs lie.



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