Advanced physiology for doctors



The Risi Law.

Analyzes marked as “urgent” will be delivered by the most roundabout route possible.

Rule of Warman.

Until a patient is prescribed a certain drug, no one looks in his medical history about the presence of this drug allergic drug.

The Curse of Marlowe.

Dissatisfaction after a patient’s loss lasts much longer than the joy of rescuing him.

Law of Melzero diagnosis.

The fact that the patient feels good does not yet prove that your diagnosis was correct.

Shild’s law.

Whatever troubles arise, there is always a colleague who knew that it will be so.

The dictum of Hippocrates.

Extreme cures are most suitable for extreme diseases.

The principle of lost time.

On Friday, after 16 hours and 40 minutes, no treatment procedure can be performed properly.

Spark rules for doctors.

1. Always look terribly important.

2. Speak authoritatively and imperiously; state, however, only the obvious and proven facts.

3. Listen carefully while others argue and discuss the problem. Then pounce on some small slip or banal statement, so that with him to bury and their opponents.

4. If a subordinate asks you a question on the merits, look at him as if he had gone mad. When he is knocking, rephrase his question for him.

5. When leaving the office, move at a fast pace – this reduces questions from subordinates to a minimum.

6. Always keep the door of your office closed. This puts visitors in the position of petitioners, and at the same time makes everyone think that you are always engaged in an important meeting or meeting.

Boren’s law for cats.

If in doubt, wash.

Eli Law for actors and medical professionals.

Be dressed in shape, and the role will play by itself.

The first rule of a doctor.

Whatever happens, pretend that it was meant to be.

First law of Scott.

Whatever happens is bad, it will most likely later appear normal.

The Rule of Galena.

The main thing – do no harm.

Merkin’s medical principle.

For complex cases, there are simple and easy to understand wrong solutions.

Wright’s law.

The doctor has the opportunity to bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his clients to put on the ivy fa├žade.

Diagnosis of Disraeli.

Often a mistake is more important than a right step.

Truism Thornier.

Many of the common diseases are nothing but the expression of a serious dissatisfaction with life.

Observation of Voltaire.

The art of healing exists to entertain and amuse the patient while his body is cured of the disease.



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